Last legs

I feel like I am literally on my last legs.

Bing weather said it was to be 82 degrees in Long Beach on Wednesday, June 6, 2012. I decided not to take a book, or beach towel to the shore or a park, but simply walk.

Waiting on bus downtown one day, a man passed me, then came back to bench to hand me a bus pass. Since I was going to downtown library, my first instinct was to give it to a homeless person at Lincoln Park. Instead, I sat on retaining wall to rest my legs, then decided not to walk home that day; short walk through Lincoln Park seemed too much exertion, so I headed for bus stop. That was months ago, yet I keep forgetting to use it or decide not to when I notice it.

Most days my body aches all over. I think that my legs should not be so sore after only a short walk to library or Ralph's grocery store. I think: well, I will stay in today, then walk tomorrow. Yet the aching sticks around, no matter how many times I try to ease it with hot bath soak or massage.

I was a little early for bus to take to Belmont Shore, planning to walk along ocean front, then catching bus back home. I walked to next bus stop to pass time. Bus was not late arriving; I could see it sitting by the bus stop one north of the one I left. It was not a long wait, but as the minutes ticked by, I thought to turn around and go home. Foot a bit numb or tingly, breeze a bit too cool. Did not feel anywhere near 82 degrees to me. Sun, was pleasantly hot.

Getting off bus, I decide to check out new books at Belmont branch library. I considered forgetting about the beach, just sit and read by the bay until time to catch next bus homeward bound. I sat on a built-in small seat outside of library, trying to massage arch of left foot without taking off sneakers. I stretch out legs, one at a time, twist ankles hoping that will relieve the aching legs and tingling foot.

Normally I would walk barefoot along water's edge, but did not want to bother taking off sneakers, so walked in slightly wet sand along concrete divider ~ no sidewalk on that side of the street. When I got to the ocean, I decide not to walk along the shore. It seemed so far away. As I walked I thought about all the homeless nights I walked the length of that road to pass time. I used to get tired then too, but not like now.

I had that longing for yesterday. How many times did I stop at end of bike path for a drink of fountain water, before skating back to where I got on bike path. I enjoyed being by myself, skating around that parking lot, learning to maneuver; figure eights around parking meters; increasing speed, trying quick stops. Fun time in my life.

I think about walking, as I walk, how easy it used to be. As I neared the end of that beach area, I sat for a while on a pigeon poop covered step. It was dry, like chalk; must have been swept off, but permanently bleached. Decided to take bus home. If I could make it to bus stop. At bus stop, check schedule. Have 20 minutes to wait. Decide to walk to next stop, rather then up the side street ~ just in case. Truly did not think I could make it home. The thought of slight upgrade on side streets kept me on Ocean Blvd.

I did not think my legs would take me the short distance to bus stop. Relieved, I sat, getting ready to check time, take book out of bag to read. Yikes, I had barely settled on bench, bus pulling up in front of me.

I asked driver; Late or early? He said, after checking his watch, he was two minutes late. My lucky day, would not need to wait twenty minutes afterall.