Saturday, April 07, 2012


A condemned prisoner is dying a slow death due to Scleroderma, in the novel, The Leopard. I do believe that is the first time I heard mention of the illness in a fiction novel. Not so, the mention of "young African-American Senator that has a good chance to be president someday". When I see mentions of President Obama as Senator, I check books publishing date to see if author wrote about Barack after the election ~ which is usually the case. Quite a few novels weave his name into their stories.

Reading about the character with Scleroderma made me feel bad ~ thinking I never fully understood my oldest sister's suffering due to the disease. I thought that I did. Looking back, maybe not as much as I should have. Perhaps her witchy attitude came from frustration being at mercy of the disorder. Yet the progression of her nastiness began well before she was diagnosed with the twin disorders ~ Raynaud's Disease and Scleroderma.

I always loved her; thinking of her as a second mother. At the end of her life we were no longer on speaking terms. I could have let bygones be bygones and continued the charade of sisterly love; but did not. I did not like to see her suffering, yet felt she used her illness as an excuse for bad behavior.

When I first started blogging, I wrote all about it ~ The Mess of My Mother's House; Stan's Room; $100. Pink Capri's ~ well, no longer recall the blog posts' titles. Perhaps I will try to recreate the posts ~ that mess was my prelude to homelessness; cleaning it up at my mother's request is what lead to the end of friendship with my sister.

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